M of Witches Town @signalstation@witches.town
so long, witches.town
please forward all scrolls, message crows, and visions to: a.weirder.earth/@signalstation
PLEASE NOTE: It is still legal for humans to keep their IDs in their mouths if they like, though you may ask them not to and remind them that mouths have germs. Please use appropriate gloves or germicides if you come in contact with a mouth ID. Your safety as a poll worker is paramount.
WARNING: Robots who pass for humans are circumventing our voter ID laws by 3D printing their own IDs.
If someone asks for a ballot and produces their ID from their mouth very slowly while making whirring and beeping noises, please give them a provisional ballot to complete until we can determine whether or not they're a robot who has taken the place of a registered voter human.
My fave podcasts:
* The Twee White People Banjo Hour
* Statistically Unrepresentative Crime Stories!
* Two Goateed Chucklefucks Talk Endlessly About Comic Book Movies
* The Bad Interviewer Interviews
* I Have Two Semi-Famous Friends
* Oversimplified History
* Slapdash Content Trowled Onto Blue Apron Ads
Scientists agree: Email is terrible. But what if there were a newsletter that didn't even end up in your inbox because you could read it online?
TAKE THAT, science! Go live in a pit of mud!
Now there's a new collection of short fiction by me, posted by me, and read by... YOU?!? Could it be?
http://www.signalstation.com/lost-time-incident-65-hide-your-identity-and-keep-your-family-safe/
Please support my Patreon!
$1/m - I will write your name in my dread book in blood, but that's it. Nice calligraphy, tho!
$5/m - I will mention you to the Coldest Nebula during weekly summoning
$10/m - We can meet for lunch and you can taste my sacrificial blade (not a euphemism)
$50/m - When the mountains crumble and you are out of tears, the Mouth Beneath Everything will take you last
$100/m - OMG you're the best! I'll send nudes. (Also, you'll be saved when the stars fall, etc. etc.)
@gravezwave
I was thinking along Lovecraft-y lines today as well, but I hid it entirely too cleverly as dumb-quiz-clickbait nonsense and people wisely avoided it.
What're the odds, eh?
This is just a bit of fun! Copy and paste for your friends. Can you fill this out honestly? :-) Afficher plus
Dude could hang out and nap anywhere, but if I settle on the couch to write, he likes to see if he can insert himself in the process. It doesn't take much typing from the arms he has pinned to convince him there may be easier places to nap... but he'll try it again later anyway.
Visited the RSS memorial today. After all these years, it's still amazing to see the lightning hit it—every hour, on the hour—and then watch as the sparks ripple out to the aggregator towers at all the cemeteries that are still subscribed.
The Carnival came to town and they've got all the rides. The Slide of Mirrors. Fish Throw. The Widening Gyre. Pick the Brick. Goldfish Graduation Ceremony. The House of Spooks. Kiss Tunnel 4000.
They guy who works the booth smokes too much. In the haze you can barely see the balloons you're throwing darts at, the open mouth clowns you're spraying water at, the criminals working off their community service by dodging softballs. Mostly dodging.
The dunk tank is full of Dr. Squib because that's the town's biggest employer. All the brown noses trying to get dunked. Making their resumes soggy.
I hate this town.
WHAT GAME ARE WE PLAYING, AGAIN?
Based on your answers to the quiz, your character’s most likely alignment is Standing On a Rooftop While the World Drowns, Awash in Awe and Loss
https://youtu.be/sBtRIRiTJqA?t=2m34s
My brothers and sisters, adorned in the scraps of civilization, skinny and tired from sleeping in drafty caved-in skyscrapers, hold their breath.
The warm haze never lifts. The city's half under water.
But somewhere out there... we hear the honk of a red nose.
2020. THE FUTURE.
Our desperate band has constructed a faux tiny car made from reeds and plastic shopping bags. The trap is baited. We wait.
Tonight... we feast on clown flesh.
Escape Pod-Dwelling Astronauts: Not Pressing Self-Destruct Button on Space Station 'Just a Social Norm', Not Explicitly Banned
"You're not like the other girls" he said. "They're not REAL, you know? They don't have scythes for arms and compound eyes."
Unfortunately for him, he forgot about the powerful mandibles I use to behead males after mating with them.
not always good at keeping in touch
"SKIP!" I shout in the crusty prospector's face.
"Now, wait jus' five more seconds there, son. What you gotta know about investing for retirement is... you gotta avoid unreasonable fees!"
"SKIP!" I scream into my rented cowboy hat.
A Wild West robot theme park but some robots keep talking to you about candy bars you should try, and about new cars you can lease. The saloon's piano player says a $50 tip in his hat will keep all conversations "era-appropriate, pardner."
I write short, nonsensical fiction and sometimes it gets mailed out as a newsletter, but who reads email anymore?
You can read the latest installment on a proper website here: http://www.signalstation.com/lost-time-incident-64-wife-of-a-clown/
Or go do anything else. Up to you. The sun's going to explode some day, so...
Just a heads up: If/when I get cancer, you better believe I'm gonna have a GoFundMe. But none of it will go for medical care. Only stupid stuff.
I'll pay someone $100 of your money for a nice stick. A stick I don't even need. (It'll be nice, though.)
I'll eat a $50 bill. I don't care.