...we worked hard to reclaim 'queer' and I'm not really willing to give it back up. I don't need you to use it. But it's still my word for me.

On the gripping hand, I'm pleased (even though I'm sometimes confused) that 'gay' has lost the connotations it had when I was a baby queer. See, back then, 'gay' was the word assimilationists used -- it signified you weren't one of *those* "scary homos". You weren't "queer as in fuck you". So I hear people nowadays self-id as 'gay' and my first thought is, wait, I didn't think you were that conservative? And then I figuratively slap myself and try to catch up with the times.