**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:11

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:11

patience ❎ @patience

31 mai 2017, 01:11

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

because of anti-D adjustment issues, i've missed at least two instalments of monthly queer (ok, LGBTQ) book club hosted by the public library. i went tonight, and there were new faces

for the most part, it was really good. there was an awesome Black lesbian woman in her late fifties with great historic hindsight on stuff happening in this city back in the ’70s and ’80s

but a cis white butch a few years younger than me came in just after i did & sat next to me. and for nearly the entire night, the tension between us was palpable. i could almost feel her bristle the couple of times i brought up radterfs in the discussion

**patience ❎** @patience · 2017-05-31T01:16:25Z

patience ❎ @patience

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

also, she stated early on how she disliked labels (as do so many queer folk, myself included). the way she argued it, though, suggested she disliked being *described* in any capacity

she gave me a couple of dagger-eyed looks, however fleeting, when i'd be looking at her and saying 'cis' generally in the context of our discussion. she never framed anything she said in the context of intersectionality. then when she learnt that next month's book is April Daniels' Dreadnought, and asked me what it was about, she seemed to lose interest promptly and didn't join us at the circ desk to pick up her copy

it's like some things never change

31 mai 2017, 01:16 · 0 · 1

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:30

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:30

31 mai 2017, 01:30

patience ❎ @patience

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

given things for which i've bore witness over the years, i realize i've an established bias against cis white lesbian women who even hint at old-guard essentialism. (she did so by grousing how they "didn't cast a butch" in Boys Don't Cry)

i can feel my walls of self-protection go up the moment they (the white part is totally core here) use exclusive coded language or refuse to look you in the face once they know you're trans

i realize i don't want to have this bias, this prejudice, but i'm also recalcitrant abt not wanting my people to be wiped from the public/social realm or from existence by intx'nl centring of themselves over us

**Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social** @wilbr@mastodon.social · 31 mai 2017, 01:31

**Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social** @wilbr@mastodon.social · 31 mai 2017, 01:31

31 mai 2017, 01:31

Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social @wilbr@mastodon.social

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

@patience seems logical to me. Book clubs can foster weird exclusionary opinions like that.

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:36

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 01:36

31 mai 2017, 01:36

patience ❎ @patience

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

@wilbr she was new, and i've been there (except for months when wellness issues kept me from going), since the inceptive book club meeting. i attend anticipating there will be a broad variety of world views and plenty of different ways of seeing the same book. but it's as if there's simply no discussion to be had around radterf-ish folk and their contempt for trans folk, chronically so for trans women

**Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social** @wilbr@mastodon.social · 31 mai 2017, 01:39

**Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social** @wilbr@mastodon.social · 31 mai 2017, 01:39

31 mai 2017, 01:39

Moved to @wilbr@glitch.social @wilbr@mastodon.social

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

@patience sigh. I wish people's identities weren't treated as mere differences of opinon. (And I'm an evil straight white cis man.)

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 06:05

**patience ❎** @patience · 31 mai 2017, 06:05

31 mai 2017, 06:05

patience ❎ @patience

queer book club weirdness Afficher plus

i just remembered how i had been hoping for an opportunity to casually mention/drop how i've only ever dated women and how i'm lesbian, just so i could gauge her expression, but the opportunity never presented itself

[truth be told, i've only ever dated women, virtually all of it after i voiced as trans, but on a kindey scale, i'm not a "gold star 6", but probably more a 4½]