"Hey emily I like this kinky stuff i see"

Cool!

"But I'm asexual"

So??? Ace people can be kinky if they want to be! There's this bad assumption that kink has to be sex, it doesn't! Kink doesn't have to be anything but what you want it to mean. Do you like calling your girlfriend miss but don't like getting hurt? That's ok! Kink is personal! Want to be tied up and abused but don't have any desire for sex? That's cool too!

"but isn't submitting to someone sexual?"

Only if you make it that way! Never let anyone else tell you about "real kink" cuz they're fucking stupid, your relationship is real. Standards are dumb