I use man, and dude, reflexively, regardless of the gender I'm addressing.

I'm consciously working on it, but when I'm distracted and don't check every single thing before hitting send, it happens.

I'm really sorry. I'll do better.

@Maenad I was chatting with a friend about this last week and we made a distinction between

things like "man, I really hate this salad" or "DUDE where's my car"

and things like "hi man what can I get you" or "dude, your hair is nice!"

idk I guess the former two are more exclamations or interjections, and the latter two are directed at the person being spoken to?

anyway i'm ~totally cool~ with case one but case two seems to bother me. I don't know. if I see enough people do it in a non-gendered context I will probably get over it.