Caelyn McAulay @math_foo@witches.town

@noelle I know it is no substitute; but: *hug*.

Tooting drunk!

Wait, I don't have to be drunk to be honest here. You are all awesome, supportive humans.

Feel good about yourselves today!

I get tired of this shit. I am cranky and cynical before my time. I feel like putting on an armor of rudeness and strong language it is the only way that I can survive.

I am not strong enough to meet this with love and compassion. I am not strong enough to come into to work and be a gentle person with everyone I interact with.

I worry that I have become poisoned, that in my efforts to defend myself from the toxicity and to keep myself from being treated as a doormat (again), that I am now contributing to the problem.

Tonight, I overheard something that made me pretty sad.

I overheard one coworker say to another: 'Someone's gender doesn't matter when it comes to programming ability'. And then a co-op responded sarcastically with 'Yeah, that's why we employ so many'.

The co-op clued in that I was within in earshot and try to dig himself out by addressing me with 'You represent you gender well here'.

Fuck you too buddy, fuck you too.

@Alda Merci Alda,
Ce n'est pas un travail facile que vous faites.

Au jourd'hui, j'ai acheté des tulipes violets, juste pour faire beau ma cuisine.

This is Freddy. She is the Prime Minister's security dog.

She is a very good girl who works hard protecting Mr. Trudeau and was enjoying her orange ball when I took her picture.

I did not ask to pet her because she is a very serious dog; but I wanted to so that she would know that she is a very good dog; but I am pretty sure she knows.

Today's exciting news is actually pretty exciting. The prime minister is coming to visit our office.

You know what that means?

Adorable security puppers there to protect Justin Trudeau. 😊

Also, I have to leave an hour earlier than usual since they are locking the building down.

Whenever I feel sad because my code isn't working, I like to watch How It's Made videos. Something about watching all of those complicated things happen flawlessly over and over gives me hope that somehow I will solve the problem in front of me.

They can automatically roll bagels. I can figure out why this exception is getting raised.

Today marks two years at my current employer. When I started, I was the 11th developer. Today, there are 30 developers. I was the first developer who is a woman. I remain the only developer who is a woman.

And I feel shitty about that.

I like the work I do and I like the freedom and autonomy that I have there. But I do not feel good about how bad diversity is there.

I do appreciate that they don't talk about it. That is to say, my previous employer was pretty awful at diversity too; but said they were good. At least I am not being lied to.

Went swimming tonight. My shoulder always feels better after a swim; but the randomly replaced tiles at the bottom of the pool drive me crazy.

They have been replaced by tiles that are not just a slightly different shade of blue, they are a slightly different size.

J'avais bahn mi pour le dîner! 😂

@lord J'essai! 🙂

@chamsz Merci!