kitsch [active at chitter.xyz] @kitsch@witches.town

have you ever just wanted to reach out your tentacles and pull someone into your lair? you know what i mean?

the thing is,
i /know/ people care about Kitsch

you all reinforce that very well and i'm thankful for it

but
that doesn't necessarily carry over to... whatever my offline counterpart is

i know the flatmate just forgot what she said because she was drunk

but i can't help but mull on it with this meaning, with this pattern, even if i know it's distorted thinking

it's... easier, this way?

last month, one of the flatmates said she would find some cute pictures of girls' haircuts for me since i'd mentioned i was trying to decide on a hair style

and she never did

and i don't think it'd really help much anyway

but now and then i think about it and quietly nod to myself,
unimportant and easily forgotten. that's me.

in her defense, she was drunk at the time
in which case
it's no surprise that someone would only care about me while inebriated

(tough guy voice) if you want to get to me, you'll have to go through /me/ first.
and good luck with that, buddy. /I/ can't even get through to me.

strange goings-on

it is not even necessarily a threat of a cat transformation though that is definitely implied but also that yes a regular person can indeed get petted like an catte

perhaps the next cat to receive gentle pettings will be... you??

-physics errors sending you careening at uncontrollable high speeds

-certain areas on the ship becoming too hot to touch

-sometimes the hatches won't open

-falling off of the world, and continuing to fall indefinitely through noncorporeal empty copies of the world and its skybox

-npcs can't figure out how to perform simple tasks

dreamed of sailing a dangerously glitchy virtual sea on a ship with a mostly inexperienced crew, and making it through safely

all-out boob

i say a lot of things that end up feeling... inaccurate...? and it bothers me a lot that i'm like this

i know i sometimes say something about myself or my preferences or my feelings or etc. and i'll believe it to be essentially true,
but at another time i might say something different, maybe different in tone or sometimes outright contradictory and also believe it and often not remember that/why i felt a different way,
and while it's frustrating for me,
what's most important is that i'm scared that i'll confuse or hurt a friend by doing this.
i don't like existing with such short memory.

i feel gross and am anxious that it'll get worse and probably can't sleep

i'd thought of this as a mild illness and i guess it is but that doesn't mean there isn't a problem

i guess i want it to be known my status

sleep snuggling with a large cat

nose

(i can smell my own scent at other times, but this is slightly different.)

keep thinking i faintly smell some animal, but the only animal that would've been here... is me

kitsch, who figuratively can't stand on her own two feet

kitsch, who is inept

rock 'em, potentially also sock 'em, robots