Honestly, most of my initial heroes in academia were men. A lot of them still are, much as my current role models are mostly women.
The thing about historical male academics is they generally fall into a specific pattern: short weeks with a lot of time for drinks with the boys, active hobbies, and a tiny, attractive partner who's less successful (by an academic metric) than they are.
I....... fit that pattern. I want to fit that pattern. That is the life that I want. My choice of partner earns a lot of raised eyebrows in academic circles because it's as if I'm "settling". I might be, but not for those reasons.
musings on academia, gender and sexuality Afficher plus
@kara_dreamer I mean there's a larger cultural trend there.
Stories of male partnerships tend to be with other men, and not romantic. (Buddy cop movies are the classic for me, but there are others).
Stories of female partnerships tend to be romantic.
It's fucking disgusting.
That said, I want my life partner to be separate from my work. Science as an all consuming passion is a toxic ideal - it's work, and work life balance is good, and makes you a better scientist. I don't want to do work with my life partner over dinner, I want to relax.