Ohhh I'm tipsy and high so this might be bullshit but I wanna get it down: a significant portion of my queer identity is in opposition to masculinity

Like my gender, in all its iterations and fluctuations, is always "not masculine"

And my sexuality/romantic orientation is generally attraction to women & nb ppl but an aversion to masculinity. Like a degree of masculinity is tolerable (toxic far less so) but at a certain point/degree it becomes unattractive or even intolerable

And I guess this is performative? Not in my self but in the way other ppl act that influences my attraction. Which can be problematic when it comes to trans masc ppl I think bc someone can be as binary masc as hell in their identity but that might not come through in my attraction?