It's interesting to me that I need to have a certain amount of defiance in me to put makeup on at work nowadays.

I don't want people to think that I need to have makeup to be comfortable (I don't).

As I do it less, I get less and less confident that makeup is something that I'm even proficient at. I feel like I need to start over with practicing.

I also don't want people to notice and then try to see the "before", or lean into that trans