I need to practice not being intimidated by people who are smarter or have it together more than me. I'm realizing I left-swipe a ton of people in dating apps just because I think they're too good for me, and rationalize it as them being "phony" or "too perfect." When the whole point is they can ignore you at their discretion...
I just realized I had it bad when I saw a woman leasing a sublet went to Yale and was doing cool stuff with medical knowledge and programing. And instead of thinking, "Wow, what a neat person to live near," I felt sick and angry at my sloppy, executive dysfunctional self. And this is how I push myself down. I think I'm having constructive insights from bad feelings? Is this how neurotypicals do it?
@ikea_femme I have these sort of feels all the time. About people who went to better schools, who transitioned earlier, who have "productive" hobbies, who are better at tech, you name it.
But I'm friends with some of those people anyway, and I know they have lots of insecurities, too. Often of the same kind, and sometimes (and very weirdly to me) even about something (always inconsequential-seeming) that I'm okay it?
I don't know if that helps; it doesn't always help me. But, um, it's a thing, I guess?
@ikea_femme ohh have I had nights like that