girl: The rest of my family is dead and I became a spy and have endured torture and enslavement for this organization because they promised to save my brother from being executed
this dude: ok but you don't even know how beautiful you are and i would like to kiss you
I want to set my kindle on fire.
the girl has two black eyes and he is thinking about kissing her
i'm calling the cops
@guerrillarain Let me guess… A man wrote this?
@Sylvhem NOPE. That's the wildest part!!!!
@guerrillarain Wow :O.
I'm just saying, if my face was so battered my eyes were swollen shut and I did it for the revolution and somebody decided to romance me in that moment
I'm kicking everybody's ass
mmmm it's sexy when men get homicidal - this narrator right now
guy: I killed a lot of my friends and then I almost stabbed my best friend in the heart.
this girl: let's makeout
lawd have mercy you two deserve each other ya bunch of weirdos
@guerrillarain gotta railroad that romance