@Nire I always feel a bit weird using she/her and saying I'm not binary. But the same time I feel like I have a very different relationship ship to femininity compared to most my binary friends.

@geekylou yah also like, once I was secure in binary identity it uh, moved

@geekylou Plus, I want to be clear I know this sounds a bit like that biphobic trope that bi people are just confused gay or straight people figuring out what orientation they are.

It's just my personal experience, and enbies are valid! I'm just not one of them, and for a brief period, I thought it'd somehow be easier to be one. Which I doubt. Either way, I wanted medical transition.

@ikea_femme I don't think it's an either or. I definitely needed medical transition but sometimes that feels separate from my identity (not sure that made sense).

@ikea_femme I seem to get these feels quite a lot when I dress femme, it not my normal state of being.

@ikea_femme @Nire maybe I should try being femme rather then my more butchy transbian self more often and see if it gets more or less comfortable.

@geekylou @ikea_femme better to just be you, probably?

@ikea_femme @geekylou like, yeah using it as a crutch of a sort is a thing but that said I've also seen prob 7/8 of ppl saying that end up back at nb once they're secure enough in binary identity and acceptance, and I do wonder how much is a final push from a brain to get ppl into the hrt brain needs instead of settling just for nb, f. ex

@Nire @ikea_femme omg yes that's exactly it. I needed to be on HRT more than anything else. Even lower surgery did feel that important, though I'm glad I have my current bits now. I kind of don't really care how people see me 90% time (I care about it more because of the fear of harassment more than it being my core identity).

@geekylou @ikea_femme yeeeeah yep yeah

@Nire @ikea_femme yea I'm probably over thinking it all. Thanks for the help though.

@ikea_femme that's exactly how I felt in the early days like "I can be genderqueer so I won't need to transition" . Now though I think it's something else. I kind of don't care so much now about how people see me as long as they don't harass me (I still want them to use the right pronouns, though I'm not sure why).