@eribloodlust also should mention that ablism is a part of this. the thing about the american dream is there is an assumption that everyone has the same starting point and will succeed if they have the work ethic. european tech community seems to have a similar vibe.

i told some men, "i have a hard time to find work in tech, because discrimination against women in that field."

one actually replied "i dont think its discrimination. at my work, there are no women, so there isnt discrimination"