✨ geoff, but witchy ✨ @cooler_ranch@witches.town

https://glitch.social/media/rVKUkm5xkbatDjskk7M

my wife just read a thing that says scientists measured elephants' responses to stimulus, and the relative "same" part of their brains lit up looking at humans, as does in humans when we see puppies

Y'ALL! ELEPHANTS THINK WE'RE ADORABLE

I CAN'T HANDLE THIS INFORMATION

RT @UR_Ninja@twitter.com: #BREAKING: Jury has found all 6 #J20 defendants not guilty on all charges

facebook's VR hangout Miiverse thing aesthetic is probably the most fucking crushing & horrid thing ive ever seen. like has anyone ever created anything worse https://mastodon.social/media/vH94wqtWX3Wtdb59-ps

nerd: *sayin some nerd shit*

me: hey u nerd!!! go fuck a ........ . .. uhhh. ................. schematic

HQ version ripped by NeilC: https://vimeo.com/174597335

Conkey Dong

Draque: the Sith were a race. They looked similar to
Me: *interupts, already laughing uncontrollably* WALUIGI

Plot twist: they really did just love pizza all along

At the climax of the movie the protagonist rushes to the airport just in time to see the pizza about to get placed on the conveyor belt all the checked luggage goes on and confesses their love while also brandishing a box with a diamond ring in it

hello 🐘friends-

there's a line in "it's the most wonderful time of the year" that says "there'll be scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of christmases long long ago"

excuse me, i always thought, scary ghost stories? since when was that a part of christmas?

but instead today i thought- that should be a part of christmas.

so who wants to post some Scary Ghost Stories on christmas eve & christmas day with me?? originals or retellings, fiction or nonfiction. let's make this a thing.

*to the tune of TMNT* non consensual js mining, non consensual js mining~

mastodon.host is using a Javascript miner.

Well I'm glad to have my own instance.

https://mstdn.io/media/k3y3N4iEdFCHP6U1sOI

Maybe 2017 is the year we throw away Die Hard and accept Maniac Cop 2 into our hearts as the world's new favorite Christmas movie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDpzGiP-PrU

boost this status if you are a lizard, like a lizard, or are using a computer