tfw you think you see an exotic new insect horror shattering the peace of your new home but it turns out to be a leaf

I grew up somewhere the ice killed everything less hardy than me on an annual basis

now I live in the nasty sweaty fucking tropics of California and it is the land of monsters

northern spiders: chill, harmless, eat bugs that otherwise would pester me in summer. welcome in my home

California spiders: will melt your flesh with venom of a potency that is frankly unnecessary!