Soon after arriving in Rivendell, Merry is murdered, and Pippin spirals into pipeweed abuse.

Frodo sits in the corner, writing his emo novel about what's afoot.

Aragorn is at the center of a love triangle with Arwen and Éowyn, but they wind up with each other rather than with him because he's boring, even if hot. Elrond disapproves of everything

There's endless gaybaiting with Legolas and Dimli, with Dimli starting to overstep the rules of dwarven heterosexuality but they keep discovering bodies or nazgul or whatever right when they're about to get nasty

Samwise actually investigates the murder while others are preoccupied