what is your favorite wizard joke
(trying to impress a girl)
@SpeedyPandora oh this is good, this is good
keep going
@alyx that's all i can think of >.<
@alyx
Hmm, if we're allowed graphical media, perhaps an image of a wizard at a computer, subtitled
"The wizard will now install your software"?
@crazylemon oh wow that's great!! she's gonna love it! 😍
@alyx
alternatively in a similar vein,
https://mastodon.host/media/-MLxYi55YyvWhwSNA3A
@crazylemon i think we better keep it positive for a first date!
@alyx
if you want one that works better in text/vocal conversation, perhaps you could try:
"What is the most powerful reptilian magician in the land called?
The arch-lizard!"
@alyx
and if the category of "wizard" is broadened to general magical disciplines, you could have:
"What is a thaumaturge that specializes in feline manipulation called?
A neko-mancer!"
@crazylemon i am reliably informed that this is a wizard-only date, thank you though
@alyx oh i know just the thing that always impresses the ladies!
i put on my robe and wizard hat.
@lifning that's some high-level shit. not sure i'm strong enough yet.
@alyx
What do wizards stop for on the motorway ?
Witchhikers !
What do you call a wizard that comes from outer space?
A flying sorcerer!
What happened when the wizard turned a little boy into a hare?
The boy is still rabbiting on about it!
What held together the Wizard’s magic book?
The Spell binding!
What kind of wizards really love pie?
Pyromancers!
What are popular names for a wizard’s babies?
Al Chemy for Boys and Necro-Nancy for girls!
Why did the wizard start up a company?
He has plenty of staff!
@BadWrongFun @alyx there's lots of good ones with "staff" as the payoff:
Why did the wizard go to the hospital? He had a staff infection.
@BadWrongFun i'm sorry but i have fact-checked these and every single one is false :(
oh here's one
"how many wizards does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
[pause for a moment as they reflect]
"trick question. there was no such thing as lightbulbs in the age of wizards, you incredible tit."
not sure this strikes the proper romantic tone tbh
@alyx you expect me to just conjure a wizard joke out of thin air?