Morgane, vache-lapine d'amour @Morgane@witches.town

Bon bah environ 7h de sommeil au final a me fait une nuit correcte quoi que morcelée.

J'ai du prendre un des medocs que j'ai en rab' qui fait pioncer et est contre-indiqué dans mon traitement actuel et avec mes problèmes au cœur par contre, pour avoir ces 4h de sommeil.

C'est pas exactement vaincre l'insomnie mais c'est un début.

J'ai dormi 4h cette nuit, victoire !

I want to throw up and I can't because I took meds and also it's not healthy but damn it hurt.

I don't even want to be before a computer. I just want to sleep, I am so sleep deprived. Just sleep, peaceful sleep.

Fuck why do I even take this med, it's meant to calm me down but all it does is fuck up with every good moment I live ? Insomnia when finally all is settled and I can enjoy a peaceful sleep with my gf. Headaches, nausea, etc.... when everything was fine before.

I will really ask to change because it's been 2 weeks and it's already too much.

Not to talk about : I've never had such long depressive episodes in months ? Is it linked to that or to the fact anti-depressor dosage went up ? I don't know but all of this is getting heavily on my nerves.

All I want is to sleep next to my girlfriend. Just that.

Update : I hate insomnia.

Nouit nouit.

Maybe soon I'll travel a lot, or not. Going back to montpellier or to a place nobody will be able to reach. Or there is still a possibility I'll stay on Paris. Anyways, feels like the choice isn't up to me anymore. Yet I will take it, that decision. I have a bit more than 4 days to make up my mind.

I hurt all people that come too close to me, but nobody believes it until it's too late.

Positive thing : gf is sleeping well.
She deserves a good sleep.

Je crois que ça fait le 4eme jour où je mange ~rien. Mon corps commence à pas aimer.

Actuellement en PLS dans le canapé avec 4% de batterie.

But I'm stronger and I will fight ~