Morgane, vache-lapine d'amour @Morgane@witches.town

I want to throw up and I can't because I took meds and also it's not healthy but damn it hurt.

I don't even want to be before a computer. I just want to sleep, I am so sleep deprived. Just sleep, peaceful sleep.

Fuck why do I even take this med, it's meant to calm me down but all it does is fuck up with every good moment I live ? Insomnia when finally all is settled and I can enjoy a peaceful sleep with my gf. Headaches, nausea, etc.... when everything was fine before.

I will really ask to change because it's been 2 weeks and it's already too much.

Not to talk about : I've never had such long depressive episodes in months ? Is it linked to that or to the fact anti-depressor dosage went up ? I don't know but all of this is getting heavily on my nerves.

All I want is to sleep next to my girlfriend. Just that.

Update : I hate insomnia.

Nouit nouit.

Maybe soon I'll travel a lot, or not. Going back to montpellier or to a place nobody will be able to reach. Or there is still a possibility I'll stay on Paris. Anyways, feels like the choice isn't up to me anymore. Yet I will take it, that decision. I have a bit more than 4 days to make up my mind.

I hurt all people that come too close to me, but nobody believes it until it's too late.

Positive thing : gf is sleeping well.
She deserves a good sleep.

Je crois que ça fait le 4eme jour où je mange ~rien. Mon corps commence à pas aimer.

Actuellement en PLS dans le canapé avec 4% de batterie.

But I'm stronger and I will fight ~

Mon traitement je sais même plus ce qu'il est censé faire j'y comprends que dalle c'est sensé me boost en journée et me calmer le soir ça fait parfois l'inverse, parfois ça me calme toute la journée et la soirée en plus, parfois je fais des épisodes chelou alors que c'est censé les prévenir, etc...

Je crois qu'il va falloir le revoir.

J'aimerais bien sortir de cette semaine d'état dépressifs aussi. Genre ça fait au moins 4 jours (au moins) que je suis déprimée sans énergie sans espoirs et franchement c'est barbant.

As soon as the coffee is drinkable and that I'm a bit more awoke, I'm gonna moo a lot.

That's my plan for the day.

Ça me rends grognonne, ouin D:

<- actuellement en zombie :
"caaaaffééé"