Now this usually kinda goes away after sleeping, except that it doesn't anymore ? I'm supposed to talk with a friend every morning when she wakes up because she's having a very bad time. And I'm just ashamed of even saying "hi". I'm going insane with pain, and my life is easy as fuck compared to what she's going through. I have it easy and I have no right to complain. I'm just a phony. This is why I usually stay by myself, the less people I'm in contact with, the smaller the occasions of me being stupidly jealous of everyone else. I deleted most of the social/dating apps I usually use for pointless attention grabbing. It doesn't help. I'm lost.