well looks like a wrist splint won't be enough to let my fucked up hands play guitar safely
I mean, I can play for brief periods, but not without locking my wrist in the bad 'bones overlapping and getting stuck on each other' position, which a) hurts and b) I'm not supposed to do
after more than a few minutes of putting pressure on it that way it locks so bad I can barely get it to turn again; plus my grip strength sucks and my angle is weird so I can't do anything complicated anyway
guess I'll have to wait and see if surgery might help or if I should just give up
pls cut out a piece of my wrist bone it deserves it

I mean I hadn't really played in ages anyway, but now that I know for sure that it's because my wrists are deformed and not just because I'm not that good at it/bad at practicing it feels... unfair. I used to really enjoy it, even if I didn't do it very often
one more thing my body won't let me enjoy, much like running, long walks, anything high-impact, sex... and it'll probably get worse as I get older, especially since I'll probably end up with arthritis. like, tf am I gonna do if I lose the use of my hands at all?

@cmdrspacebabe you make me think about Narcissa, do you know her?